My world has finally caved in on me as I realize that I am somehow connected to the very thing I cant have. I dont know why I cant have it; maybe its because im not chasing it, and if I chase it, it will just gets farther away. So I just do nothing.
This thing is you.
As I do nothing, I absorb as much as I can from the life that I have outside my 9-5 job. I read a book, hang out with friends and family, watch a movie- and sometimes I actually wonder how you’re doing, but that’s irrelevant.
It turns out that those very things that I absorb can be directly related to you; not that those things remind me of you, or what we use to have, but they are the very things you absorb, in your life, outside your 9-5 job. The thing is, is that they occur sometime in your life before they occur in mine. Not long before. Just enough for me to notice you.
I feel like this can be related to the red string of fate, not saying im a believer in destiny, but seriously, we share these sporadic moments. You just undergo these moments a little before I do. Never at the same time and never after me. Always before. Which made me come to only one conclusion- I will never catch you.
But I want to catch you, I want you to want to be caught by me. I think that we can be great together. And at the same time, maybe you’ll get bored of me because I will always be one step behind you, and if so, at least I am aware that a feeling like this can happen. That a connection like this, between two people, is possible.
So if what I said is correct, you may never read this because I am in your past; or rather a silhouette in your rear view mirror. But on the slim chance that the tables can be turned, I will put this message in a bottle for you in hopes that it wont get lost at sea.
